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HORN OF PLENTYChanges of seasons love can die September 30 ExaustedI can't memorize those historical things and years,especially Chinese acient history.
I can't remeber what the maps look like,Chinese geography in perticular.
I can't force myself to study the boring POLITICS,it sucks.
I can't work out math puzzles,they are beyond my range.
I can't avoid making different kinds mistakes in English exams.
I even can't write a just-so-so compisition in my mother tongue.
My gosh!What's wrong!
Ms Liu (the teacher in charge of our class)asked me to go to her office and had a talk with me.
She said that I hadn't work hard enough.
Well, I remembered Mr.Li's sentence 3 years ago
"You are only an excellent student,but not a top student."
I really dislike they divide students into different levels,though it's mainstream.
Maybe,Ms.Liu is right.I wasted too much time on worthless things,I still have the space to improve,I have the ability to catch up with top student.
However,she didn't know that I was too tired to explain.
Really,I'm extremely exausted.
I'm not feeling OK. September 09 Disconnection?!This afternoon,on my way to dentist's with my papa,I found something really disappointing.
I told my papa about the gig for the first time,seriously.I even forget I hadn't told him.
To my surprise,he replied 'You should have told me earlier!I could get the cheapest plane tickets and find hotel in BJ for you!'
Oh,no!That was the worst mistake in my life!
I never expected my papa would agree,since he has always been so strict with me.I only told mum about the gig,as soon as I got mum's refusal I gave up.When I think about it now,I'm quite sure that if I had insisted,my mum would have agreed.However,I didn't,that was my choice,the most unforgivable choice in my life.Maybe there's really a comunication problem between my parents and I.
But at this stage,it doesn't make any sence to regret.
That was MY choice,MY OWN choice.The only reason for it is just the EXAMS.
Well,I can reassure myself with any excuse.
But I can't forgive myself for the relationship between parents and I.
I was so rude ,self-central and selfish towards my parents,especially there are endless conflicts between my mother and I.It's time for me to consider this problem seriously.
I remeber a piece of lyric of The Cardigans'
"If there's comunication, I disconnect."
I don't wanna be the second Brian Molko.
So I'll try my best to connect.
But now I still haven't the courage to write it on my Chinese blog.
September 07 Blue ChinesePLACEBO has already arrived Beijing, I'm still home.
Everyone is preparing busily, I keep quiet.
Suddenly I realise.
PLACEBO is not only my favourite band,it's the band which has greatly changed my life.
I admit that it was BRI's glam looking that attracted my first.Then,their music,their attitude,their perfection.
I can remember every attractive voice, every guitar chord ,every special rhythem that have moved me.
I can remember how hard I tried to get their information and news,how crazy I was when I write reviews about them.
However
There are to many irresitible things in one's life.
Unfortunately
one of them occurs to me in a worst situation.
I don't know what to say.
I just feel blue,
extremely blue.
Sep 9th,2006
a scar in my heart forever.
August 30 Start AgainTomorrow evening I'll go back school to start my SENIOR 3 life.
A busiest year,a darkest year,a most challenging year,a year which can decide my whole life.
I'll always remeber Bri's sentence,
"In order to do it,you have to burn the bridge behind you."
and his lyrics.
"Don't give up on the dream,don't give up on the wanting."
Well.I'll try my best.
For my parents,for Emily,for Piggy,for Rya,and of course for myself.
God bless me.
August 25 Watched 2 movies I couldn't connect to the Internet yesterday,so I took out 2 DVDs to kill the time(with lots of homework undone = =)
The first one is "The King and the Clown",a Korean movie which was quite popular in last few months.the English name is normal,but the Chinese name is extremely funny,sounding like a gay movie.Anyway,it's about boys' love,but no much homo stuff in it.The plots are nothing special but at least attractive,we can only consider it as a normal movie.
The other is " Violon rouge, Le",a French film,telling a story about a legendary violin through 3 centuries.As an art film,the plot is OK,and the construction of this movie is perfect.It mixes many stories in different spaces and times with a single clue---a violin called "the red violin".I'm attracted by this movie,really.
 Guest BookIf you have anything to tell me,
please feel free. :) August 24 Delight of Tori AmosRose’s sister was back to China 2 days before. I asked her to buy some of Tori Amos’s CDs for me from USA. I had 50 dollars cash at that time, since it didn’t make any sense in China if I kept it, I thought it was much better to spend it.
As is known to all, Tori’s CDs are indeed PRECIOUS THINGS in China. China has never brought in or released any of her album (let alone EPs), and even in black market there’s little. This time, I’m quite happy coz I got 3 CDs, namely “Under the Pink” “Stories of a Librarian” “Scarlet’s Walk”.
I’ve just watched the additional DVD in “Stories of a Librarian”. I admit Tori has always been one of my favorite female singers . I’m attracted by her special way of playing the piano, her sexy (at least I think so)voice, her wise lyrics, her tender emotion and her remarkable grace. Though she’s nearly 50 now, not only I but also every fan of her know, she and her music is forever marvelous.
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